Punks Not Dad

We were alerted to this quality piece of music by a post on twitter possibly from thebeernut (can't find it now)

Anyway hope you like it...enjoy!

New mission for 00B

The recession is hitting our company too and members of room G5 are coming under the knife.

00B our resident flash games guru is leaving the confines of the real-world G5 to become our front line recession correspondent giving you all the news on this crisis direct from the welfare office.

No doubt this will give 00B the opportunity to play more games, rest, drink and perfect his plan to take over the world.

Good luck 00B!

Blog roll and a courtesy flush

Most people understand a blog roll to be a list of links to other blogs, but have you ever thought of the term 'blog roll' in a different light?

Many people enjoy having a bit of a read while sitting on the throne so wouldn't it be a nice idea if you could buy toilet roll with blogs on.

We envisage this working a bit like reading random blogs on blogspot, but rather then clicking 'next blog' you simply roll out the next sheet instead. The first page of each blog would be printed one after another in a random order on the paper and if the blog on the current sheet doesn't grab your interest you simply wipe and move on to the next one.

Of course this product is not without its problems. Careful attention would have to be paid with regard to the type of printing process used as one wouldn't want black smudges left on ones backside. One would also loose some of the functionality found on a normal blog page in that none of the links or dynamic content would work at all. But these issues are small and could be overcome or forgiven.

This is a great idea for a business and we are looking for any investors or dragons out there to work with us and bring this product to market.

Is this the best money can buy?

A couple of these little cakes arrived in the office today and we have been informed by a colleague that they are called 'millionaire slices'.

We were a bit bemused at this name as they look rather boring and taste very sweet indeed. This is certainly not a tea time treat fit for a millionaire. A millionaire’s treat needs to be bigger, tastier, more chocolaty and frankly more impressive then this little mars bar style biscuit!

Brutal result for Braken!

Well its all over now. Our dreams of a Brakenist state were dashed at the weekend as Johnny Bracken failed to gain a seat in the Local Elections finishing with a total of 333 votes, only 2.8% of the total vote. Unlike our on-site poll which shows Bracken miles out in front, the real Bracken machine has lost its sat-nav and is now poorly parked at the side of the campaign trail.

Despite the tireless efforts of our in-house team and the hard work of our London correspondent it seems that our message failed to reach the voters in Offaly. One can only assume that this is not our fault and that it is more likely due to a lack of broadband penetration in the the Offaly area.

Is this the end of Bracken? We hope not!

D-Day for Bracken

It's the final day of the local election campaign for our beloved John Bracken and support has never been stronger. Through our network of country wide correspondents we have heard that people from all over the country are converging on Tullamore to lend their support.


The competition is strong as you can see from the list of candidates below, but we are confident that our man will come out on top.

Bracken, John - Independent (in pole position)
Buckley, Molly - Fine Gael
Butterfield, Johnny - Independent
Callanan, Colm - The Christian Solidarity Party
Cowen, Barry - Fianna Fáil
Dolan, Dervill - Independent
Dooley, Sinead - Fianna Fáil
Dormer, Lorraine - Labour Party
Feery, Frank - Fine Gael
Killeavy, Brendan - Sinn Féin
McKeigue, Tommy - Fine Gael
Moran, Frank - Independent
O'Brien, Sean - Labour Party
O'Brien, Vincent - Fine Gael
Owens, Danny - Fianna Fáil

In the face of battle Bracken is undeterred and has been getting in shape all week in an effort to be at his fittest for the final push for the top today.


Brackens strongest competition as a fellow independent is Johnny Butterfield. Despite not knowing much about this character we suspect he has little chance of regaining his seat this time out, especially with a hair cut like that.

We are urging all our Offaly readers to get the word out and use their influence on friends and family to vote Bracken in today.

More analysis on Monday after our landslide victory!

Pavlov's dogs

"Pavlov's Dogs. The most famous example of conditioning involves the development of conditional salivary responses in Pavlov's dogs. If a tone was reliably sounded before the dogs were fed, the dogs would eventually start salivating when they heard the tone, even if no food was present. The dog's responses (salivation) to the tone are said to be conditional upon the dogs' experience with the pairings of the tone and food. Dogs that have not experienced this condition do not salivate when they hear tones. Pavlov's dogs are therefore said to have been conditioned. Their reactions to the tone have been changed through experience."


source: http://fixedreference.org/en/20040424/wikipedia/Conditioning#Pavlov's%20Dogs

So, according to that theory, I get the urge to make tea every time you (gravy) play that bloody Bracken-song!

The lesser spotted Bracken

Following on from last weeks post about John Bracken we've had some breaking news from one of our correspondents in London who has sent us this photo of a man in an Italian restaurant in Kings Cross.
When questioned he claimed that John Bracken has eaten there, but we reckon it's just a cover along with the Italian accent and that this may be how Bracken is funding his campaign and reaching the Italian food loving public!
If you have any pictures of Bracken or followers of 'The Cult of Bracken' please send them in.